Merry Christmas 2013 - 10 random facts about me - Christmas Edition

I'm so sorry that this card is so small!

Good morning all! It is one day before Christmas! The day we remember our Savior's birth. It is a good time to get together family and friends, to take a breath, to reflect, enjoy good food, open gifts, watch good movies and be thankful!

Random Facts:

1. I'm a last minute shopper. I have a friend who starts thinking very early in the year about her Christmas shopping, that's not me. My husband even starts thinking early about Christmas shopping. Bless his heart!

2. I love seeing Christmas lights and decorations! But I do not take a whole lot of joy in putting them up, my husband does and he usually does most of it. I add some touches. And no, I am not Scrooge.

3.  I don't like the expectation that comes from gift giving and receiving but I LOVE watching my niece and nephew open their gifts!

4.  This will be the first Christmas that Adam and I have at our house with some of our family. In the past, we were either with my in-loves or my family.

5.  My favorite Christmas songs are "Oh Come All Ye Faithful!" and "Oh Come Let Us Adore Him!"!

6.  I have some good Christmas memories, like when the grandchildren/cousins would go to the the back room and sing.

7.  I DO NOT like Christmas music to be played before Thanksgiving. After Thanksgiving is just fine for me. Stop trying to mix the holidays or rush Christmas. It's become so commercialized! Ugh!

8.  My parent's family tradition is to watch "It's a Wonderful Life".

9.  While watching "It's A Wonderful Life", we eat the popcorn that comes from the tin can (Caramel, Butter, etc). Side Note: The cans seem to be getting smaller these days.

10.  This past Sunday as we were singing a Christmas song (I wish I remembered which one), the Christmas message about Christ's birth struck me afresh! How awesome that the Son of God would be born in a stable and laid in a manger, a trough! The announcement of His birth was made to Shepherds! He was born to a common woman. It was a Holy Night!

Luke 2:1-20

1 And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be taxed.

² (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)

³ And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city.

⁴ And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)

⁵ To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.

⁶ And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.

⁷ And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.

⁸ And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.

⁹ And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.

¹⁰ And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.

¹¹ For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.

¹² And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.

¹³ And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,

¹⁴ Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.

¹⁵ And it came to pass, as the angels were gone away from them into heaven, the shepherds said one to another, Let us now go even unto Bethlehem, and see this thing which is come to pass, which the Lord hath made known unto us.

¹⁶ And they came with haste, and found Mary, and Joseph, and the babe lying in a manger.

¹⁷ And when they had seen it, they made known abroad the saying which was told them concerning this child.

¹⁸ And all they that heard it wondered at those things which were told them by the shepherds.

¹⁹ But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.

²⁰ And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told unto them.

MERRY CHRISTMAS ALL!

Love,

Mrs. M



Today

Today, I was happy to wake up next to my husband in the darkness of the morning as the light was deciding to come out or not.

Today, I was happy to think that tonight I get to go watch Thor on base with my husband. I can't wait! A date night---woo-woot!

Today,  I am happy just to be me and no one else.

Today, I am so happy that I can read other blogs because though I should be working, I need to take a break and see what people are sharing.

Today, I feel super blessed that God is taking care of us. When things have been so frustrating the past couple of weeks dealing with doctors, insurance company, pharmacies, us fighting each other for what we each want ---things have calmed down and we are getting closer to our answer. (Blog for another day)

Today, I'm grateful for the air in my lungs. That I can breath without thinking about it.

Today, I can't wait to drink the Peppermint Tea from Celestial Seasonings. It's won my palette! Sorry Trader Joes, but you need to work on your peppermint tea.

Today, I thought it would be a good time to be right here, to write, and be present!

I hope you all are doing well!

Love,

Mrs. M

Run Like No Is Watching!

Waiting like a horse at the gate, ready to run!

 

After this past Thanksgiving, eating to my hearts content, we had a race to run! We trained as much as we were going to and ready or not, we were going to run!

 

 

Some of our running swag

 

I was happy to hear that the race was a little later that morning though I was a little afraid that it might be a little warm as predicted by our weather forecaster. I should really learn my lesson already -they are not always right! It was so wonderful to be able to sleep in though!

 

The night before, I "put" our sweaters together...I'm such a procrastinator! With my amateur sewing skills here are some of the results:

 

Complete with Bowtie and Argyle socks, and Gingerbread man stocking which came in handy for dog treats :)

 

Finally, after getting ready, we drove to the Naval Training Center (NTC) now called Liberty Station in Point Loma, CA to get our running party started!

 

The cool story behind NTC is that it used to be the training facility here in San Diego for Navy recruits. I think they closed the base down in 1997.  My dad, my uncle, my brother-in-love AND my father-in-love all got their training here! AND not only that but I got to live just across the street in my cute little studio apartment for 3 years. It is now called Liberty Station and opened for all sorts of fun businesses. When I lived across the street, I used to love to ride my bike through it, think, pray, run, eat and think that years ago I knew people who actually lived here while in training. It was sometimes creepy.

 

Anyways, back to the race.

 

There was Santa in all his puffiness welcoming all the runners and walkers!

Before the run in our Ugly Christmas Sweater Swag (We were butt bombed!)

 

Like horses at the starting gate, ready to go!





After taking the scene in, using the bathroom and getting in line, we were ready to go! They said the race started at 11a.m. but we didn't start running until maybe 20 minutes later. I guess they had to control the mob by breaking us into sections. So we waited and waited. I wanted to get off and running PEOPLE!

Sorry for the blurriness of this picture but that was the starting line!

 

After the team in front of us left the starting line, we moved on up to the front. Pictures were snapped *CHEESE*! We were yelling *ARE YOU READY FOR THIS?! YEAH, WE'RE READY!* Countdown, *THREE, TWO, ONE, GO!*

 

Adam and I ran together for a little bit and then very sadly,  I left him behind. *Sorry honey!*

 

Okay, when I say run, I mean jog. I had the music from my earphones pumping in my ears as I passed the walkers. I wanted to run this and not stop. Every time I saw a funny sweater or a volunteer would cheer us on, it was like a breath of fresh air to my lungs.

 

I stopped for water (and they had hot chocolate to drink, really?!), I stopped two other times to walk a few steps. But my legs still had bounce in them and would not let me walk for long. I almost tripped once but kept on running. I almost felt like throwing up once but kept going. I found out smiling helps when running :)



This beautiful view came into view!

 

I saw the finish line, the "snow" and heard the people cheering! The closer I got, I felt the snow on my face and the feeling of victory as I finally passed the finish line (sounds like a movie, at least in my head). I made it!

 

 

As I waited for my dear husband to come through, I called him on his cell phone. He picked up, he was almost there! I stayed on the line until I could see him. 

Yeah, Baby!

He did it! We did it!

 

Afterwards, we were suppose to go to the Sam Adams beer garden to replenish our electrolytes. (Yeah, right!) But sadly their taps were not working! Oh well, there were some yummy food trucks awaiting us and grub we did!

 

I cannot believe the endorphins that rushed through my body! As the adrenaline was coming down, the endorphins were rushing in. It was one of the best feelings ever!

 

I told Adam in my endorphin induced state that I want to do another one. And I do! Maybe it will be a 6.2 the next time! I know anything could happen but I can dream and try my best in the process!

From me to you! Love, Mrs. M

 

 





 



 



 







Ready, set, run!

Adam and Nala after a run/walk

People! My brain is so ADD right now! I can't concentrate. Here I come to you from my office desk. There is stuff  on my desk that needs to be processed but Thanksgiving being around the corner I am in vacation mode. Oh, I wish I was taking the day after Thanksgiving off and NOT to shop but to just hang around and enjoy family.

Nonetheless, this weekend will be a fun weekend! On Saturday, Adam and I are registered in the Ugly Sweater Run San Diego!

I thought this was my first 5k ever. But going back into my memory bank, this will be my 3rd or 4th but this time it is a RUN and not a walk.

You have to understand this - I am NOT a runner! In high school, I HATED P.E.!

In the 10th grade, I had a super crush in high school. He could have been compared to that player  Tiger Woods. One day our teacher had us do a timed 1 mile run. Note: I am NOT a runner! At the end of the run, I was on the ground on all fours, gasping for air, looking a HOT MESS! My crush looked back at me in disgust as  he walked away with the rest of my class as my teacher is tellling me to breath. Lungs, please!

So fast forward to when I met my husband and when he came home from Iraq. When we talked about this and that, I think he said one of the things he wanted in a woman was that she was a runner. Looking back I think that was so he could be encouraged to run because now that we've been married for two years, I have found out that he does not like running at all! Unfortunately, it was one of the little things that I was worried about for a little bit. But now I'm not!

Reading a few blogs, Facebook, etc about people who are runners or people who have the ambition to run a half marathon or a full marathon has got me thinking.

From working around people who have to keep in tip top shape, I would hear about the injuries that would occur due to running and sometimes a surgery that was needed to correct the problem, aka bad knees. I don't want to be the hobbling old woman in my older years!

It wasn't until a week after I found out I pregnant that my friend Nefertari asked if I wanted to train for a half marathon. And I was like, um...she said, you're pregnant huh?! So with that I decided that it was in the best interest of me and the little babe not to be doing something so strenuous, at least I thought it was, not being a runner and all.

After losing the baby and going through grief, training for a half marathon was the furthest thing from my mind.

It wasn't until months later, I started to think about it again. After having another heartfelt, encouraging conversation with Nefertari, we turned to a lighter subject - running! We talked about what our outfits might look like. We would be the Running Skirts!

Now when a friend of mine on Facebook invited a bunch of people to run in the Ugly Sweater run, I asked Adam if he wanted to and he said sure! So I signed us up for it!

We decided to train 3 days a week and the other days would be for weight lifting. I can't say that we have been totally faithful to that schedule but we have been doing it.

I have to say that the woman I am now and the girl that I was then are a bit different. I can run longer without gasping for air, I have a bit more grace for myself when I can't totally run my goal and I have a man that loves me!

So Saturday we will be running our first 5k together!

Ready, Set, RUN!

I hope you all have a very uncommercialized Happy Thanksgiving with your friends and family!

Love,

Mrs. M

Gracie, Nala, and Daddy

Bling In Friday and Inspiration

Friday the 15th Bling!

I know I am not a hand model but I am a girl who likes to try new things with her nails even if the polish only stays on for one day before chipping . But I really like this and wanted to share some inspiration!

It's Friday which means for me that at this very moment there are only about two hours away from my work day being done. Girls, can I be honest with you for a moment? I'm sure I've said it before but I'll say it again. All I've been daydreaming about is having babies and being at home with them. I dream about being home and fixing it up (really). I sit at my desk doing work and wonder what my purpose is at this job and then I start to think of new places to move to, to shake things up a little bit. The only thing (and it's not a problem) with that is that I'm not my own. I in this wonderful relationship called marriage and I'm not in a place to think of what "I" want to do. It's we now. I would like to find another job where I live but what if I get pregnant and then what am I going to tell my new employer, "sorry, but I have a baby coming. I know you just hired me 8 months ago but..."

Okay moving on!

Tamara Carson- my cousin (I was sitting in the back, so I didn't get the best picture) with her son Solomon.

Last night I had the honor of attending my cousin's first book release/book signing event! I can't wait to read her book. The program that was laid out last night was very well done and she had many of her friends and family there to support her. We are so proud of her!

Her book is called Journey to Juneteenth (Collective Writings). I don't know about you but I really didn't and still don't know a lot about Juneteenth. Last night, I learned just a little bit more.

Every year, my grandmother's family in Texas gets together to celebrate Juneteenth. From what I've heard, it's such a fun time getting together with our relatives young and old alike to celebrate this day with food, games, stories, etc. I think I should make more of an effort to go along with my husband next year.

On Tammy's road trip to Texas (I think it was last summer), she gained a lot of inspiration to write this book. She learned more about our family's history.  She collected stories and other writings to make this book come to life.

There was one thing that really stood out to me that she said. She said that if you have a dream to write, don't give up. There will be times where you hit a block while writing a story and you may feel like you can't finish developing the story, because you start to think, " what will "so and so" think if I write this" or "will people stop reading if I write about this" and you want to move on to something else. Don't do that, keep pushing through that block.

I know for me there have been times where I start to write about something and then it gets too hard to write about and I feel it's too personal (but important enought to write) but I get frustrated and then I just stop. Hence, all the drafts in my blog box. She encouraged me to keep writing.

So my encouragement to you: Keep writing!

If you are interested in reading more about this book, go to: www.JourneytoJuneteenth.weebly.com .



Put your Bling on and Keep Writing!

Love,

Mrs. M

Take One and a Few Other Takes

 Family Picture- Take One!

My Mother is so good at getting her Christmas letter with pictures out! Every.Single.Year! Me? Nope! I even have a friend who when she was just married last October, she sent her first married Christmas picture out on time. The first year I was married, that was one of the furthest things from my to-do list! I had every good intention on putting something together but it didn't happen.

BUT this might be our very first year, second year of marriage of actually sending out some Christmas cards to some of our friends and family!

Thanks to my dear husband, he thought it was a good idea to go out and take some pictures at the park. The Do-It-Yourself kind! Good for him for thinking of that. I was so tired happy to oblige him.

I can only imagine how difficult it might be for some parents to get their children to stand still to get the perfect picture. Try getting an untrained dog to sit for awhile. I'm telling you I think we have a dog with A.D.D., if there is such a thing! Poor Gracie. Nala on the other hand, she listens to commands pretty well but when you have a little dog trying to play and jump in your face, that would wear anyone out, dog and human alike!

I think I know which one we are going to use. And though it wasn't our last picture taken that day, it should be what all family photo sessions should end up looking like. Like you've had fun!

"Nala, look at daddy!" Mind you she's blind. "Gracie, good girl for sitting!"

"Nala! Gracie!", snapping fingers. "Over here!" "Honey, you need to hurry up and take the picture," he said. Smile!

"I'm hot!", I complain. Smile!

"Nala turn around!" Nala just plops on the ground. She's tired. We burst out laughing!

Do you send out Christmas letters/cards? 

Don't worry. No pressure here! Don't compare yourself with the "Johnsons". Just have fun, whatever you decide to do!

Love,

Mrs. M

Friday Fumblings!

                                                                Friday Hand Bling!

It's Friiiidaaay! Yay!

When you are at work all week, it's something almost magical about Friday. If you are kindof like me, you dream about what the weekend holds. For me it may look like this, for this weekend:

-Concert time with the sis tonight!

- Just being home. Give me at least one full day, just being home and I'm happy! I'll take a few hours though. It happens kind of rarely but when it does, it's wonderful!

- Cleaning the house. I love a clean house. Now does it happen all the time...um, no! I'll let you in on a little secret. It is my dream to one day stay at home and be a stay at home wife and mother. Maybe then I can have a cleaner house. Just kidding! I know... But I still want to be a stay at home wife and mother. But that's for another blog!

- Hiking. Adam and I have talked about doing more activities on Saturday morning but after a long week, sleeping in sounds and feels more desireable. But tomorrow, I will do a little bit of hiking with a friend of mine.

- Knott's Berry Farms! Yay! Gotta have some amusement park time. OR we may do some bike riding with my brother in love who is starting his cross-continent bike ride and he is starting down towards Mexico. Bless his heart.

- Church! I'm so grateful for our little church community. I love that our church! We are an imperfect bunch but I'm glad we can encourage each other in the Truth of God's word.

- Movies :) we may see Gravity AND Captain Phillips. Expensive, right? No, not if you can get on base. We get to watch them for FREE.

- Breakfast with my parents. I can't wait to see them!

Sounds like a full weekend! No wonder I look forward to the next one right when Monday rolls around. But for some strange reason, I feel unusually energized!

Well, whatever you do, have a fun-filled, relaxing, relationship bonding weekend!

Love,

Mrs. M



Oh, One More Thing...Awkard moments

Awkward moments. We've all had them!

Here's my short story:

Yesterday, as I was shopping for groceries at the Commissary, I went through my grocery list that I had in my head as well as on the paper I was holding, so that I wouldn't forget what I needed.

Pregnancy tests, I need pregnancy tests. For this cycle and next. You never know.

So as I rolled my basket passed people and saying "excuse me" to others, I saw a Sailor standing in the spot where I needed to be.

In my head I thought that he must be buying pregnancy tests for his girlfriend or his wife..how nice. I was imagining, their surpise when they found out she's pregnant and how exciting that would be. *Cue Music*

So I stepped behind him to the right, to look to see if I could find the tests that I needed.

Oh, there they are! Good!

As I was reaching for a couple of boxes of tests, he reached for...condoms. *record scratch*

Awkward!

It's funny how they put pregnancy tests and condoms in the same space. Don't overthink that one.

Keep it Classy y'all!

~Mrs. M

Technical difficulties!

Hello there! Here I am again coming to you alive and well from my work desk in Sunny San Diego!

I have been wanting to write for quite some time now and I have been unable to due to "technical difficulties" that I have experienced!

But I have been enjoying reading some of your blogs and commenting on some of them. This whole Blog lovin' thing has been a little frustrating but I think I might be getting the hang of it now.

There has been so much that has happened since the last time I have written. Here are some of the highlights (in no particular order):

- We had two weddings in October to attend - one for my uncle-in-love (literally) and one for some friends of ours. Both were beautiful!

- We celebrated our 2nd Wedding anniversary at the Welks Resort and saw Hairspray! It was relaxing and Hairspray was the highlight. Yes, I am a blessed woman!

- We went to Cabo San Lucas and I got to snorkel for the first time but that didn't happen without getting scratched up on corraled rock (ouch!). But the experience was pretty cool since I got to see pretty fish. I just hope the next time, I will be in water that is less turbulent. We did a sunset cruise which was pretty amazing! As a side note, I love the movie "The Count of Monte Cristo" and in that movie there is a part where The Count and his old friend are fighting. We got to see the point of interest that was in that movie and take a picture while in a boat. I have always wanted to see that place! And I finally did! So cool! I wish I could show you..maybe if I re-edit this piece and put in some pictures :)

- We have yet to conceive a child but I have more hope now. I stopped taking the "Magic Bullet" since my last miscarriage. I don't think that low progesterone was my problem. Since then we have seen our Specialist twice and the last appointment that I made to see her was to tell her what step of action I would like to take next. So as the time draws nearer, I will go into a little more in depth of what we will do.

- We celebrated yet another year of life for my husband's birthday!  Next year he requested a big party. Decisions, decisions!

- Some friends of ours had their first child after trying for more than 5 years. That little girl is so much more precious to them and she is the cutest little thing!

- We went to a married couples getaway with Family Life's Today- A Weekend to Remember. I want to do it again especially when we have childrend. It was so cool seeing couples there in every stage of their marriage and even the pre-marrieds. The speakers were down to earth and very transparent. I came away with tools that I hope we incorporate in our marriage. One of the many things I learned is that you are either moving toward oneness or separation. I'd rather move toward Oneness! I mean what's the purpose of getting married just to have yet another person in your life. If you are married, beside a relationship with God, your relationship with your spouse should be one of the most precious relationships you have. Your spouse is your gift! How many times I have taken that gift for granted. There is so much to say here but I'll leave it at that :)

- Adam is finishing up his schooling for welding and moving on to Green Construction. We'll see where the Lord leads as far as jobs go as well as our living situation.

- We got another puppy! Her name is Gracie. I didn't want her when he told me about the dog that he wanted to get but she is surely becoming part of the family and I do love her, no matter how much she licks me! She is quite the runner!

- My husband allowed me to go visit a dear friend in Monterrey and in that visit, I got to make some new friends. It was a blast!

Well, my friends that is all the news I have for now!

Have a wonderful day and Keep It Classy!

~Mrs. M

Get up how early and do what?!?

We are getting stronger!

So as I mentioned in an earlier post, my husband and I decided to not eat meat for a whole month except for fish once a week. I took it a step further to include no sweets, no junk, no wine, and no bread. For the most part I did...okay. There have been several times where there was bread, a few times where I had wine and few times where I had sweets. Dissapointed? A little. Despite that I did lose a little. But the consequence of my choice to indulge on one particular day cost me to gain back a couple of those pounds and then I held steady.

My husband decided to really step it up, especially since we are going on vacation! So have started to hit the gym in the mornings. Hey, for now it's free for us, why not?! But.mornings. (UGH!) Not only that but let's get up at 5! No, 4:45 a.m.! (Double UGH!)

The first morning we got up at 5 a.m. and left the house around 5:15. He decided that that was too late to leave so we needed to be up by 4:45. Believe it or not, the first morning after the workout, I was pumped! The night before the second day, I decided to pack my stuff (clothes and necessities) so after the workout, Adam can drop me off at work. After that I was even more excited! Not only did I get a morning workout in, I was on time to work. I got to do my nails and grab a smoothie! (After that I brought stuff to make my smoothies! Cheaper and better : ) )

This morning was another story! Tired and feeling out of it, but we still got up (me grumbling and body complaining)! I have come to the conclusion, that in order to have success with our workouts, we need to be well rested. Therefore, I need to go to bed at 9 p.m., not 10 or later!

Since we have been going to the gym, I am starting to feel a tiny bit of difference in my body and it feels good! My face (I feel) is looking less and less like the Michelin man's sister. And I can feel my collar bones! I know vain. But it feels good! and when I feel pain in my legs from the walk/run I do in the mornings, I can smile because I know our workouts are doing my body good.

The biggest plus is that we get to work out together! It's another bonding experience that I get to have with my husband and I am grateful for that!

My hope and desire is that one day we will be healthy enough and have enough energy to run around with our children.

I'm grateful to God for giving us the motivation to do this and encourage each other in this new phase (and hopefully continued phase, not fad) of our lives.

As they say, "Take it one day at a time." And that's what we are doing!

Love,

Mrs. M

P.S. And because my hair is natural, I have no excuse not to exercise! It will be interesting when I get extensions but that's for another post.

Dear Diary- Blog (hatin') and the Magic Bullet

Dear Diary,

I have FINALLY figured out how to get here and write. I can't just go through blogspot anymore. I thought I could because because when I did go to blogspot, my newsfeed kept rolling and well nevermind. Here I am again!

I started a couple of entries and wanted to finish them..maybe for later. There are a few things to catch up on.

The biggest thing for me is that I finally started taking the "magic bullet" at night. There are many forums and such that I have read regarding these little things. But I have yet to hear them referred to as the Magic Bullet. I mean, some women talk about these things as if they are indeed magical and that these little things helped them to get pregnant and better yet keep the pregnancy.

Ah, yes, progesterone suppositories - the Magic Bullet. My doctor prescribed these to me. Before I gave her the GO to order them for me, I felt like maybe this was a decision that my husband (aka Habanero) and I should make together. But I remember the time before we got married and had a little discussion on birth control - should I get on the pill or not. He pretty much told me it's my body and my decision BUT he did tell me he wanted to start trying for kids six months after we were married to which I said one year would be better. Girl, I'm SO glad that I didn't go down the birth control route! One, I was afraid of the side affects as the wedding date was fast approaching. Two, I'm to old for that! Three, if I had taken them, the problems of us having a child anyways probably would have been masked by that tiny pill.

So as I was thinking and my biological clock was ticking in my head, I felt that this is a pretty small step and I think it would be okay to make this decision by myself to go ahead and ask the doctor to order them.
So all that to say, I'm finding progesterone seems to be working fine with my body. I'm not having all those yucky side affects that I have read some women having. One thing I have noticed is that I am super hungry, but that could be because I am on a semi-diet (no meat, no sweets, and sometimes no bread) or PMSing. Who know. But it's nothing that I can't handle with God's help.

If it does not work this time around (as I think I may have started earlier than I should have), then we'll try it the next cycle. If that doesn't work, we'll go on to the next step.

I hope that after all this is said and done, when my child (children) start getting older and start to act up that I won't be that mom and say, "Do you not understand all the stuff I went through just to have you?!!"

Oh guess what? Since being on our diet, I have lost 5 or 6 pounds and I love it! Oh it's hard sometimes but I can't help think that if we choose wisely what we put into our body, how amazing we will feel!

I'm wondering what are some of the yummy alternatives to junk food that people enjoy? Some of my favorites are dried seeweed, homemade kale chips, and stove popped (with olive oil) popcorn.

Well, I could write more but I got work to do!

Love,

Mrs. M

Dear Diary - FOOD-LESS edition

Dear Diary Reader,

It is such a beautiful day today! It started off to be a great morning with cuddles and such from Baby. Later this morning the clouds gave way to a beautiful blue sky! I guess June gloom is on his way out the door, with my foot kicking his backside!

Come July, Baby and I decided to eat less in the way of not eating meat or junk food. Does fish count? So we decided to cut out all junk food, red meat, soda, wine, and beer. We will not cut out bread (I don't think I eat that much anyways), we will drink only water (I found some yummy water "recipes" on another blog) check it out:

Basil and Lime Water

Blueberry and Lemon

Rosemary and Cucumber

(Being someone who does not like drinking straight water unless I'm parched, these sound like a happy edition to my soon to be straight up drinking water days. What do you think? ) and we will be having Fish every Friday (sounds like Lent). This will be for a whole month! I know it will be good for us and we will have each other to be accountable to.

What a month to pick this project! I just thought about it! The 4th of July and my dad's birthday are in this month! Ack! Oh well, it will be all good. I'll keep telling myself that.

And we will include more exercise. My body knows it needs it! And since we are going to Cabo, I want to be prepared for a week of fun, fun, fun!

Oh another thing I need to mention.  This Google Reader is going "out of business", so make sure to check this diary out at Bloglovin' (the Paris button! I picked that one because I dream of one day going there with Baby, of course!).

Love,

Mrs. M

Dear Diary: Weekend Edition

Dear Diary,

This weekend was pretty eventful.

Friday night and Saturday morning and afternoon I made the time to take out my Kinky Twists. I can't believe how much hair I lost, though my hair still looks thick. It looks shorter, which is fine with me and might even be thinner, which again is fine with me. I was getting tired of my curly fro but now I was getting tired of my twists. Now my hair and scalp can breath! *sigh* My sister asked if I was embarrassed to take my hair down in front of my husband. Hmm, I don't think so. He's cool with it. I married a man who is cool with whatever style I choose (at least the ones he's seen yet).

I do have one recollection where he was taken aback with some braids that I had gotten but he got use to it.

Saturday we celebrated the engagement of our friends Isabel and John. They are perfect for each other! As he told their engagement story, I kept thinking I wish I had my phone camera on my but I didn't want to interrupt. So I just sat there smiling. I think my dear husband (which I'll refer to Baby) was thinking back to ours because he later took my hand as we sat there and listened.

On Sunday was church and boy was the message good to hear. It was funny though that as we heard Pastor talk on the story of Jacob, Rachel, and Leah (juicy story in Genesis) we both took something different away from the message. He on one hand was hoping that I heard what he heard and I was hoping that he heard what I did.  That conversation ended with my feelings being a little hurt  but you know what, God will work in the way He does. And right now, I will rest in that.

I came home after all the cafe stuff was put up and came home.

After packing Nala into the car with her food and such we headed to out of town to visit the in-laws for a birthday get together. I was kind of worn out emotionally and really didn't want to do a whole lot of talking but nothing like a little wine, food, fresh air, and my neice and nephew can't fix.

It was a nice time but I was happy to leave before it got dark, it didn't feel so long getting home. And besides that we experienced a little bit of the big moon last night (I can't think of the scientific term right now). But I guess it was suppose to be the largest moon of the year (same moon just the size of it looks bigger).

We watched some t.v. I started to watch Breaking Amish but the content was a little bit much for me last night so I turned it. I think we ended up watching Pawn Stars and Mountain Men. Of course we both fell asleep on the couch. Eventually we went to bed.

Today starts a new week and I already can't wait for the weekend! But so far the day has gone by pretty fast.

Well, that's all for now!

Love,

Mrs. M

Dear Diary: Food and Clothes edition

Dear Diary,

Happy First Day of Summer!

Yesterday was so much better. I felt productive at work and I prayed through whatever irritation came my way. Seeing my husband yesterday was sweet. I didn't see him as the guy who is selfish but as the guy who loves me and the one whom I love, we are a team. We both had a good day it seems. We went to bed talking, laughing and cuddling. We went to bed happy instead of mad and for that I am thankful.

I am finding ou that I really enjoy cooking new recipes. When I moved into a place of my own and was dating this guy, I had dreams in my head of trying all these new recipes on him. The furthest I got was chili and he didn't like it, and not that it wasn't good, he was just use to his mom's cooking. So we went out most of the time. Bleh!

So later when a new guy came into my life, I thought I would try my cooking skills on him. My first dish? Have you guessed? Vegetarian chili. He said he needed meat. I stopped cooking for him.

Fast forward to now. So when my husband and I got married, the cooking spirit cooked in and I started trying out new things. Some hot, some not so hot but he ate every meal that I made. Then I made a recipe from Rachel Ray, Lime and Honey Glazed Salmon (but I used the one in her cookbook). And he swore that I was the best cook ever! That encouraged me to try new recipes for the best man in my life.

Recently, I've tried the Korean Beef with Rice, Chicken Stir Fry, and Chicken and Dumplings.

Chicken and Dumplings and a glass of Cabernet Sauvignon

Not only have I tried these recipes on my husband, I've been trying them on some of my friends, for girl's hang out nights. All of this encourages me to be more hospitable. I was feeling that I wasn't connecting with some of the girls that I have come to know as my friends so a thought came to me to just invite them over. I am loving cooking (except when I'm tired or not feeling well), so why not share it!

Also, lately, I've been having fun mix and matching different colored articles of clothing. One of my friends, Gracie, is a master of colored clothing. She is my inspiration! I will be writing about her and her story soon!

Elevator Shot! Corral sun dress with black. Topped off with flower wedges and a flower in my hair!

Office shot! Bright yellow sun dress with striped blue tank, blue light sweater and shoes with accented red belt. And of course, a flower to top it off!

I was told when I first started working at my job that I wore too much black by one of my co-workers. She said I was the Johnny Cash of the office. Thanks! I was very comfortable with wearing black, black goes with everything! Pretty much all my shoes that I wore to work were black too. Well it wasn't until I went to Uganda, Africa that my bohemian roots started kicking in. It all started off with these  four or five skirts my friend Christy gifted to me. They had all sorts of colors that I could wear different color tops with. Don't get me wrong, I still wear black but not as much and there has to be some color!

Okay Diary, that's all I have to say. Thanks for being my writing therapy! Now to work I go.

Love, Mrs. M

Dear Diary (the cleaned up version)

Dear Diary,

It's been a loooong time that I have written in you but I know you sit by patiently waiting, waiting, waiting.

It's been a couple of interesting weeks. But most recently, my husband and I went to go see the fertility specialist. I really like her as a doctor. She seems very genuine, not trying to push us one way or the other. Maybe that's what we need because it seems like we are not on the same page of what treatment, if need be needs to be done.

Yes, we did get pregnant once but do you know how long that took?! I don't have that time to wait..at least I don't think I do. Statistics swirl around my head..over the age of 35...miscarriage... down syndrome and on and on it goes. Then I start to think "does my husband blame me for us not having children yet?", "why can't we adopt? I know he wants children of his own and he is willing to do this other procedure that I don't want to do" and all that jazz.

I'm frustrated because I'm not sure what to do. Yes, I do believe that God has a plan for us, there is no question about that. Yes, I do love my husband, no question about that either. It's just that when you have two imperfect people not seeing eye to eye or they see differently from each other it makes it hard.

I'll get back to you later.

~Mrs. M

Military Monday: Debunking the Myths About Finding a Civilian Job (Guest Post)

Happy Monday Morning to you all! I hope that wherever you are and whatever you are doing, that you are enjoying your day so far.

I am happy to introduce to you today a guest blogger. I first met Emma at Smile As It Happens through e-mail! And when I read this post that you are about to read, it could not have come at a better time!

For those of you, whether you are a spouse to someone in the military or you are in the military looking to transition to the civilian work world, this post is for you!

Love, Mrs. M

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The changes and transitions of life bring a lot of potential, but can also bring a lot of anxiety. Old sayings about “the devil you know” come to mind. While you might be excited about the possibilities that await you following your transition from the military to the civilian world, you may also have some anxiety. Many rumors circulate about the job market and what you will face as you begin searching for a civilian job. The first step is to discern which of these rumors are true and which myths need to be debunked.

Myth #1: Applying to jobs is arduous and time consuming.

Truth: Although you will have to spend some time honing your resume or tweaking it to suit a desired position, you will probably find the process considerably easier than you first thought it would be. Today’s employers understand that your time is limited. Plus, many companies have streamlined the application process. Through partnering with JIBE, a mobile recruiting specialty company, many companies can now provide electronic platforms that allow you to upload your resume and other pertinent documents directly from your mobile devices! 

Myth #2: No special services exist to assist you with your transition from the military into civilian employment.

Truth: Actually, several such resources are available to you. The organization Hire Heroes USA consists of a team of military veterans who have dedicated their energies toward helping other veterans find gainful employment. This program offers networking opportunities, job fairs and training along with dedicated assistance to each individual who joins.

Myth #3: You’re out of luck if you can’t schedule an interview during normal business hours.

Truth: While you will need to have a degree of flexibility in scheduling interviews, employers understand the demands on your time. Especially if you are currently employed, don’t hesitate to politely request an interview outside of regular business hours. Often times, interviews scheduled after business hours take place with fewer interruptions, allowing the prospective employer to focus on you and what you have to offer instead of answering questions from employees that simply “can’t wait.”

Myth #4: Although there are organizations to assist you with finding civilian employment, there is no live person to assist you through the process.

Truth: More and more personal assistance is becoming available to military veterans seeking civilian employment. All post-9/11 veterans qualify for the Gold Card program, which allows you to visit a local One-Stop Career Center. These centers supply personal career guidance, help veterans create Individual Deployment Plans, supply job referrals and offer monthly follow-up visits to further assist throughout the employment process.

Even positive changes come with challenges. Throughout your transition into civilian life, you do not have to face these challenges alone. As you learn about the various resources available, take advantage of them to help you find the best opportunities out there.

Emma is a mid 20-something year old with a passion for life, love, fitness, and helping others. She loves to be active and get involved in as many sport and community activities as possible. Emma is currently studying to become a Career & Life Coach, and loves to network with people from around the world! Check out Emma’s blog at http://smileasithappens.blogspot.com/! 

On Hope, Loss, and Faith

First, I want to thank those who took time to give us a verbal hug. I really appreciate it! It means a lot to me.

For those of you who have had a hard time getting pregnant, have gotten pregnant and then loss, you might get this- It still leaves me in awe that I was ever pregnant! There was actually a living being in my womb, if only for a bit. To me that is amazing!

I imagine the day that I will be pregnant again, to actually feel life inside of me, the fears and excitement that it will bring, and the day I will actually give birth to a live child! That is my dream.

I never understood this kind of loss until I went through it and it is still somewhat surreal. I have been through a couple of miscarriages with my mom growing up. First one, I was in First grade. Her last one was when I was a teenager. I thought I had caused it because of the stress I might have caused her through some of my rebillious actions. There could have been a couple of reasons why it happened but I was not one of them.

A dear friend of mine also experienced this sort of pain of her own. In one of my conversations with her when she told me what had happened, my first reaction was disappointment, then anger, and then awe on how she kept trusting God. "Why does she have to go through this? It's not fair!" And I remember thinking something along the lines that I hope that I didn't have to go through something like that. I didn't know what to say except to empathize with her. I really hope I didn't say anything dumb. I probably did at one point and for that I'm sorry.

Speaking of which, as I have gone through this experience, the people that helped me out the most did one of the following things:

1) Cried with me,
2) Listened, that's all,
3) Had no words but sympathized with me,
4) Gave me a hug or a reassuring touch letting me know that they cared,
5) Sent a card with no words except "Here's a Hug, we love you guys",
6) Gave me space in a non-awkward way,
7) Sent me e-mail's letting me know that they were praying,
8) A phone call just to check up on me,
9) Validated that what I was feeling was normal and okay,
10) My boss even brought me a boquet of lavender roses (color meaning Grace)

Those are some of the gifts of love that I received.

I found myself at times trying to downplay what just happened. In one particular time, someone at church asked me what was wrong. I told that we were pregnant but lost the pregnancy. She went on to say she didn't know what I was going through because she had never experienced that but just this week so and so's wife died, so and so carried her baby to term and it was stillborn...so much death! And then I said something stupid like, "yeah my loss was early, it could have been worse in the light of all these others' turmoil", like diarrhea coming from my mouth. Then later I was like, "What just happened?!" I was mad, I felt discounted, like as if what just happened wasn't a big deal! I know that there are people dying, that other people are in pain, and that there are others experiencing loss but at that moment all I needed was a hug or "I'm sorry, " not "well you think you have problems sistah, listen to what's going on in so and so's life!" I think she tried to pad it with an "I'm sorry" but after all was said and done, you couldn't put the stuffing back in the turkey (no disrespect intended).
As I look back, I see that it is God who gives us faith and keeps us believing as we go through our trials even though we have questions.

He gave my Mother faith to try for another child. She had me. And eighteen months later she had my twin sisters.

He gave my friend faith to dig deep, talk to her doctors, pray, take the medication she was prescribed and go through the procedure(s) she needed to. She went on to have two more beautiful children.

He's given me just the right husband I need, the friends I need, the family I need, and the faith I need through it all  (the misunderstandings, the tears, the fears, the joys and everything good).

Love,

Mrs. M

Where My Help Comes From...Hard Post

I started the beginning of this blog post like a month ago, meaning to write about something else and then I just saved it to draft. Looking at several drafts that I meant to post, I thought I would write one now.  This one has been hard to start. When started to write, I didn't know how to continue. Anyways, here it is, in short detail:

How do you process loss and in particular,  pregnancy loss? When you have been longing for a baby, when you have wanted to come alongside your other pregnant friends in commaraderie, when you have dreamed about this little sweet smelling bundle, when you have imagined the long sleepless nights, when you have felt the pregnancy symptoms so accutely, when you have had to get up multiple times a night because your rising hormornes and expanding uterus were causing you to pee A.LOT, when your breasts hurt ever so much each time you get up reminding you of the life that is developing inside you, you feel twinges in your uterus and other parts trying not to stress out about what that means. Then it happens.

You feel something like a period, something you were not expecting for at least 9 months. You rush to the bathroom and you see red. "Oh no! Oh no! Baby, I 'm bleeding!"

That is part of my story.

On April 20th, the day before my birthday, I woke up wondering what the day would look like. Actually, part of it would be cleaning the house and getting ready for a house building trip in Mexico. I noticed that lately I had been drooling in my sleep. I was either really exhausted or pregnant. So I decided to take a test while my husband was out finding yard sale deals.

And there it was ever so light. I could not believe it! Can it be that I'm really pregnant? So the next day on my birthday the 21st, I took another test and still faint but it was there! No way!

That day I had a little bit of spotting but later thought it was implantation bleeding.

Later that week, while in Mexico, I took yet another test and it was darker than the first two I had taken. I was so excited to show my husband and it was then that it really started to sink in for him. He was so cute, he asked, "How did this happen, what did we do different?"

That whole week, I had a little bit of insomnia and I was in awe that I was pregnant. Wow! Thank You Lord!

When we got home from Mexico, I took a digital, no TWO digital tests and they both confirmed "PREGNANT". I thought those would make great gifts for both sets of future grandparents at the birthday party my husband was throwing me that weekend! I thought to myself, it might be a little early to tell them but I couldn't wait to share and if something did happen, I didn't want us to be alone. I hate to have had fear mixed with excitement but it was my first pregnancy.

The whole experience of being pregnant was so surreal. After trying for more than a year, ever since we got married (a year and half ago) and experiencing disappointment time after time. It happened!

I didn't want to doubt that God worked miracles, because I have seen Him time after time do so many good things in my life and in others, but even this left me in shock. I was wanting to embrace this joy of being pregnant but there was at times this nagging fear in the back of my head that something could happen.

Nonetheless, we moved forward and I told a several of my really good girlfriends, who when I told them hooped and hollered, almost cried, was in awe, smiled from ear to ear, and a couple acted in guarded excitement.

Tuesday, the last day of April, the most obvious pregnancy symptoms, breast tenderness, seemed to have stopped, like as if life left me or something and then I saw some more spotting. I cried! Lord, please no. Please let this not be the end. May Your will be done but please let us keep this baby!

I went to work, really kind of out of it. It wasn't until that Thursday, I really started to snap out of it. I hung out with my friend Kaja. We went to In-N-Out and then we went shopping! That visit with her really helped pick up my spirits. I'm so grateful for good friends who have a way to pick you up when you are down.

I picked out a little outfit for our little one and a pair of booties that Kaja saw. I showed my husband and he smiled and said something about jinxing us. I hung that little outfit on my dresser. I had hope!

On Saturday, we went to a friend's son's birthday party and since it was Cinco de Mayo weekend, they served margaritas. They asked me where was mine and I just looked at them and they almost screamed when they guessed the news. I told one of them to shoosh. The other one said she understood why I wasn't telling that many people yet and how I should only tell those that if I did have a miscarriage, they would be the ones to support me. I tried to push that part out of my mind because I was just coming around to being really excited about being pregnant. It was a good day! My husband and I went to the base to watch two movies in a row. Just me, him, and the little sesame seed!

Very early Sunday morning I woke up and I couldn't really go back to sleep. For some reason I really wanted to be intimate with my husband, but I didn't want to wake him up. He seemed to be sleeping so good. So I just laid there wishing then to go back to sleep. I finally did.

Around 5 a.m. I had a really vivid dream that made me wake up and then I felt something that made me jump out of the bed and rush to the bathroom. It was so not what I wanted to see - blood.

By then my husband was awake. He rushed me to the emergency room. They did a cervix check and said it looked fine, which gave me some hope. They did some blood tests and a couple of ultra sounds.

Later that day, the doctor told us in a hurry that they didn't see anything in my uterus, a possible ectopic pregnancy because of the cyst they saw around my right ovary, that I had a negative blood type, that they will administer a Rhogam shot and that he was sorry. Then he left.

My husband and I just looked at each other, "What?!" We did some of our own research on our phones. He played some music to try to keep us occupied. And then held me as I cried. The nurse came in to offer water.

After the shot was administered, I got dressed and we left, hungry, sad, and tired. Not a good combination. He put his arm around me and said that if I needed to talk about this anytime, let him know.

We went home. My parents and his parents kept on checking up on us. After taking a long, heart breaking, sobbing shower, I called my parents back. They prayed with me and encouraged me.

I couldn't eat. Both my husband and I were both tired and I was emotionally spent, so we took a nap.

Fast forward to our visit with the OB. He gave us some hope. He said that I was still early on that they would not have really seen anything on the Ultrasound yet and the only way to find out what was going on was to take another blood test. They would get the results to us the next day.

I stupidly, went back to work the next day because I thought I was strong enough, though my manager and boss told me to take as much time as I needed.

After a women's Bible study that I went to for lunch, I went to the bathroom and it was there in the restroom that I got a call from the OB's office. The doctor that called was taking too long to say what she needed to say and then she said it. "You are miscarrying."

I left work for the rest of the week. I still couldn't believe it. Maybe I was pregnant with twins (they do run on my side of the family) and I was just losing one. I didn't have cramps, I wasn't bleeding yet. Yes, I was spotting a little but other than that was I REALLY miscarrying? I was in denial. It wasn't until this weekend that denial became reality.

Writing this, the sickness my heart feels. I can't explain it.

But through it all, God has shown me so much love and grace through my friends, family, and my husband. I had one of my girlfriends who feels so deeply, cry with me. Another friend who made us dinner. More friends who prayed for us and continue to do so. Others who have had no words to say but I know who have supported us. Phone calls from others to make sure we are okay. And others who bring some comic relief.

I don't understand why but what I do know is that God loves me. And though my heart hurts and my head is trying to wrap my mind around this, He will help me, help us through this.

In the next post, I want to talk about how having friends, sympathetic people, and caring family helps through life trials such as these.

Love,

Mrs. M